The End of the Innocence

I love the Eagles, especially Don Henley. Our ongoing joke is that Don could sing the phone book for me and I'd happily listen. So it's no surprise that I automatically stop to listen. Whether or not this would inspire reflective thought, I needed to give the man his chance to sing to me.

I listen reflecting on innocence. I distinctly remember when I lost my childhood glow, when the rose of youth was gone forever. I remember the friend who took it, and the years that it took me to work through the pain and the scars. I didn't get past it, but learned to live with it for many years.

In the weird way that the world twists and turns, this person was put back in my life not too long ago, giving me a chance to work through the pains leftover from my youth. Initially running away from it seemed to be the best choice, but running didn't come easily. Facing the past seemed the only option, so I did. Only now with the wisdom that only years can give, and I could address it as an adult. Finally, I found my peace and in that peace came forgiveness. Not a forgiveness of the hideous actions themselves, but forgiveness of the person who committed them. With that forgiveness and peace, I gained a new found confidence that I never had.

I think again about innocence, and how it's lost by us all. Is it really poisoned fairy tales, or is it just the natural rhythm of life. I think it's the latter. We all lose our innocence at some point, and it hurts us. That hurt though helps us grow. Sometimes we can work through it while we're younger, or sometimes we need greet it again with the eyes and experience of years gone by.

I am comforted by this. The rosy bloom of youth and those windswept wonderful summer days are long gone, but I also have a wisdom and maturity now that I didn't possess back then.

This too will pass. I will learn and grow from what is happening to us today.

Thanks to years of experience I know that these wonderful summer days will soon pass for my own kids. Regardless of what happens to my career, I want to be absolutely present with my own kids now. I can see the endless summer days through their eyes, and that's one heck of a gift. This gift of innocence is given only once, and they deserve to grab the ring and fly.